Ready to bridge the gap with your adult estranged child? Don't go in blind. These 10 essential tips will equip you for a more thoughtful and potentially healing first contact.

Today's discussion addresses the crucial question: When is the appropriate time to initiate contact for reconnection with your adult child? It is imperative to understand that outreach should not occur during periods of heightened stress, panic, anxiety, or emotional distress. Instead, consider the following ten criteria:

1. Professional Trauma Processing: You have sought and engaged in professional assistance to process your personal trauma related to the parent-child disconnection.

2. Understood Disconnection Etiology: You possess a clear understanding of the reasons underlying the estrangement, ideally facilitated by a specialist in this domain.

3. Long-Term Perspective: You recognize reconnection as a gradual process, not an immediate outcome. Avoid unrealistic expectations of instant reconciliation.

4. Child-Centered Emotional Priority: You prioritize your child's emotional needs above your own.

5. Anger Resolution: You have effectively addressed and eliminated any residual anger towards your child.

6. Accountability Without Defensiveness: You can acknowledge your potential role in the separation without resorting to defensiveness.

7. Perspective Prioritization: You prioritize your child's perspective and feelings over your need for self-justification.

8. Rejection Resilience: You understand that rejection is a potential component of the process, and you remain committed despite setbacks.

9. Boundary Respect: You consistently respect and uphold your child's established boundaries.

10. Consistent Application: You demonstrate consistent application of the preceding nine criteria, maintaining a focused and dedicated mindset.

Adhering to these principles will significantly enhance the potential for successful reconnection.

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